Desks & Dayjobs

Desks & Dayjobs: The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 4: Trick-R-Doodles

Desks & Dayjobs: The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 4: Trick-R-Doodles

Dear Listener, our heroes, now known as the Apple Barrel Gang, have set off on their most pressing of quests: to find the work of the missing photographer! So they embark with the help of an old friend to find the Records Room. But what will they find there? Will it be traps? Will there be terrible college interns? Will there be an adorable old woman who only wants to tell their futures that they intrinsically trust for reasons beyond their control? Listen to my tale and find out!

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 3: Apples, Am I Right?

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 3: Apples, Am I Right?

Oh, dear listener, isn’t this story heating up? Our adventurers have ordered their reputation-saving donuts and decided to take a break from their quest to just kick it at a bar for a bit. You know, dear listener, normal workday stuff. Anyway, they venture into this bar looking for dirt on their nemesis, Alan Bloodskull, and discover a hard-drinking day bar full of colorful characters that they feel they must bother. Will they make some new friends? Will they ever decide what the best apple is? My money’s on Fuji! I love those apples…

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 2: Hug a Teen

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 2: Hug a Teen

Hark, dear listener! This is the thrilling part of our adventure where our heroes set off on their quest to restore their reputation! In the lair of Tracy Vista, boss of the Marketing Department, our heroes are bedeviled by clowns, kitty-cats, triangles, and nudes before setting off to roust some donuts for noble Beardkowski! But they’re about to find out that a there’s a #GucciGang standing in their way…

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 1: The Long Coffee

The Hoffman Chronicles, Pt. 1: The Long Coffee

Greetings, traveler! Now that you’ve gotten your coffee, I can finally start my tale of adventures most mundane! Of four heroes — or villains depending on who you ask — who set out to right the wrongs facing their humble company. Come, listen as I set the stage and introduce the players! For Agnes, Brube, Maxwell and Stuart are off on their quest to get a sweet bonus…unless an old foe cuts their lives (careers) short…

The Hoffman Chronicles, Introduction: “Oh Boy, Another Leveling Up Episode”

The Hoffman Chronicles, Introduction: “Oh Boy, Another Leveling Up Episode”

Greetings, traveler! Come and sit next to me at this coffee shop so I can tell you a tale of adventurers brave and bold! Four co-workers who set out on a quest! It’s really a very exciting story, and I know you’re going to love it. But first, can I tell you about leveling up our original characters and introducing the new characters? Come on! It’ll be fun! We make jokes too!

Desks & Dayjobs, Season 3, Episode 12: The Boss is a Vampire Pt.2

Desks & Dayjobs, Season 3, Episode 12: The Boss is a Vampire Pt.2

The battle continues to rage as The Bulldogs fight with Schuyler and his cronies. Will the tides turn against our heroes four? Or will a talking crowbar save the day? And once the dust of battle settles, will Brube, Hobe, Orlando and Stuart be able to pull the NPC Inc. shipping department back together, or is it too late for the workers? Find out in this exciting finale!

Season 3, Episode 11: The Boss is a Vampire, Pt.1

Season 3, Episode 11: The Boss is a Vampire, Pt.1

It’s time for a good ol’ fashion Boss Fight! Labor Distruptor Fight? Yeah! That one! Armed with the knowledge that Reno and Schuyler have been trying to rip off NPC Inc’s shipping department, our heroes only need to escape! But Schuyler and his beefy henchman have other plans. Will The Bulldogs escape, or will they face the vampire’s incredibly boring bite?

Season 3, Episode 10: Blazing Saddles (a Sexual Euphemism)

 Season 3, Episode 10: Blazing Saddles (a Sexual Euphemism)

The Bulldogs are on the hunt for the Best Lifter trophy! In order to siege the shipping facility’s tower (or two story building, depending on how you look at it) our heroes take a chance and split the party, sending Brube and Hobe to scale the heights and break into the Louis Gimbleglam’s office while Stuart and Orlando distract the workers with a good ol’ fashion forklift fight! Will our heroes find the trophy in time to save NPC Shipping from Schuyler Tantebo? Will history remember Hitch fondly? Find out in this exciting episode!

Season 3, Episode 9: Waiting for Godot With Horses

Season 3, Episode 9: Waiting for Godot With Horses

Having just defeated Orlac Stonebasher and his B-ball(tm) team, The Bulldogs are off to the gloomy warehouse to see what the deal is with the Loading Troll. What terrors—or horses—await them in the depths of this box-filled room? Will they be able to crack the case of why is this Troll is too sad to work? Will they find out who is systematically trying to make the employees miserable? And will Stuart’s Divine Portent ability EVER WORK?

Season 3, Episode 9: Rad or Bad?

Season 3, Episode 9: Rad or Bad?

Y’all ready to take it to the rim? Heave that rock? Press that court fully? Well come on and jam with the Bulldogs as they take on their latest challenge: a game of pickup basketball against Orlac Stonebasher and his very tall friends. If they win, Orlac helps and if they lose he’ll just keep playing basketball. This guy is really into basketball! Will the Bulldogs manage to somehow beat real athletes? Or are they about to get majorly dunked on?

Season 3, Episode 8: The Wight Stuff

Season 3, Episode 8: The Wight Stuff

On their way to meet Orlac Stonebasher (and maybe to see a really cool horse), our heroes are waylaid by a new, deadlyish enemy: a wight in a windbreaker, flanked by very dull members of the undead horde. Can they fight their way through these part-time terrors, or will they be crushed by an onslaught of boring conversations, bitter retorts, and a lack of humor about a very funny Oprah GIF?

Season 3, Episode 7: Take a Candy, Leave a Candy

Season 3, Episode 7: Take a Candy, Leave a Candy

As our heroes delve deeper into the bowels of NPC Inc’s shipping facility they discover a sinister mystery afoot! The shipping workers aren’t slacking, they’re being quietly replaced by more pliant part-time workers sent by some mysterious “labor disrupter” named Schuyler Tantebo. Will our heroes agree to help the shipping facility, or join Reno and Schuyler’s plot to make a quick buck off the outsourcing? Or will they just slack off for the rest of the day to play ping pong in the break room and give DM Alex a much needed confidence boost for his character voices? 

Season 3, Episode 6: The “IT” “Crowd”

Season 3, Episode 6: The “IT” “Crowd”

It’s time for our heroes to face DM Alex’s most devious puzzle yet…walking past a security guard into NPC Inc’s shipping facility. Will our heroes be able to muster the courage to walk right up to this very normal man and say “Hello”? Or will they spend a majority of this episode devising a terrible plan, only to see it immediately fall apart? Oh, you know it’s the second one! 

Season 3, Episode 5: Clorg Likes to Gorge

Season 3, Episode 5: Clorg Likes to Gorge

Time for our heroes to set off on their quest to the shipping facility! But the warehouse is far from the offices of NPC Inc, so it looks like our heroes are going to have to knock off work early and take their fair fantasy city’s public transportation system. Can they master the FCTA or will public transportation throw them just like a friggin’ stupid horse? Will they be able to navigate weirdly anatomical ticketing machines and the hell that is other people? And who is Clorg and what does he like to do? Tune in to this exciting episode and find out!

Season 3, Episode 4: Clarissa & Reno Explain It All

Season 3, Episode 4: Clarissa & Reno Explain It All

It’s time for the Bulldogs to go off on another quest, and we’re all fired up! Especially DM Alex, who’s full of piss, vinegar and cute lil’ sneezes in this episode. This time our mission comes at the behest of greedy executive Reno Jabroni. Will our heroes be able to follow default leader Orlando Jordan to get their instructions from Reno? Or will his cut-rate Cerberus of a secretary see through their clever disguises of “Air Conditioning Girl,” “Wifi Unplugger” and “Nervous Carmel Fan”?

Desks & Dayjobs: A Miracle on NPC St.

Desks & Dayjobs: A Miracle on NPC St.

Ho ho ho, Haaaaaapppppy Holidays from The Bulldogs! In this very merry episode, our heroes take a little break from their adventures to enjoy a little gift-giving. We also have a guest DM, as Stuart takes over the gameplay so DM Alex can play as Starp and Maxwell and also get plastered on nog. It’s the most wonderful time of the year, or as we call it: the fantasy cat version of The 400 Blows.

Season 3, Episode 3: Yogurt Jeopardy

Season 3, Episode 3: Yogurt Jeopardy

It’s time for the last act of our “Music Attending Extravaganza” quest! Glam-rocker/jerkbutt Frobisher Jehuty is trying to sabotage Agnes’ set and it’s up to The Bulldogs to save the day! By horribly sabotaging Frobisher’s set! Will they successfully stop this pretentious menace, or will they find that acting like a jerk to stop a jerk just makes you the jerk? Damn, does this quest conclude with our heroes earning a moral? Eh, not really. 

Season 3, Episode 2: We Are Toilet Horse

Season 3, Episode 2: We Are Toilet Horse

It’s part two of our “Music Attending Extravaganza” quest and the band plays on! The band in question is, or course, Toilet Horse, and they’re…an acquired taste. As our heroes listen to the Doom-ska stylings of Toilet Horse, they take some time to meet the denizens of the Punch Bowl, and way more time roasting DM Alex for his STUPID emcee character. What a dope! 

Season 3, Episode 1: Everybody Tolerates Skaz

Season 3, Episode 1: Everybody Tolerates Skaz

The Bulldogs are back, and this time they’re taking their thirst for adventure / beer out to see their co-worker Agnes’ super hip rock concert. Will our adventurers be able to brave the depths of The Punch Bucket to see Agnes’ Bubis Thundercat and whoever the hell Frobisher Jehuty is? Or will they succumb to the horror of the very nice bouncer and the pressure of trying to seem cool in a room of people with denim jackets? 

Desks & Dayjobs - The Condohouse of Horror, Vol. 1

Desks & Dayjobs - The Condohouse of Horror, Vol. 1

Happy Halloween, dear listener! Open up that pillow case and let us toss in our very first Halloween special! DM (Dungeon Monster) Alex has some tricks and treats for you and The Bulldogs! In this extra spooky episode, our adventurers keep a beleaguered-by-teens Orlando company as he hands out candy from his fancy condo. Will our heroes be able to stay sober enough to handle briefly talking to strangers? Will The Sweatshop Boys act on their threat against everyone·s favorite curmudgeonly middle-manager? Will Tim win best costume at the senior center anime convention?!? WE LOVE HALLOWEEN!