After a chance Craigslist discovery of a paid internship, cash-strapped college-grad Samantha Newberg enters into a bizarre office space filled with absurd coworkers, blood-magic internet rituals, and a bewildering absence of rules! Can she keep it together and survive this corporate environment full of strange menial tasks and deadly secrets?!

- Press -

- Episodes -

Featured

Apr 7, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 13: Fast Pitch, or Lazy Bases - Part 2, or Still Fucking Friday, In Case You Were Wondering

Apr 7, 2017

And we're back! It's the season finale, the top of the 6th inning, and the Lizard People are up 6-5. The world order is at stake! So we have one question for you: Are you ready for some soft...ball?

Apr 7, 2017

Mar 31, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 12: Slow Pitch, or Lazy Bases - Part 1

Mar 31, 2017

It's the first part of the season finale, so get your pennants and softball caps ready! It's the Lizard People vs. the Illuminati! Who will win control of the Illuminati Office and the Earth?

Mar 31, 2017

Mar 24, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 11: Ascendance Day, or How The Fuck Is It Still Friday?!

Mar 24, 2017

The Moleman's prophecies were true! Elder Lizard Prime and her loyal lounges of lizards are drawing up battle plans and ascending from the Inner Earth in their fleet of Magmabusses to conquer the Illuminati once and for all!

Mar 24, 2017

Mar 17, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 10: Underground Ocean Orphanage, or Also Still Friday Somehow?

Mar 17, 2017

Ahoy! Mystery Ken and Trouble the Cat are marooned in a pipe sticking out of the vast underground ocean, until a mysterious day care boat arrives in their time of need. Will our two lost souls become guests aboard this eerie ship, or will they join the ranks of the captive orphans?

Mar 17, 2017

Mar 10, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 9: Mazes & Minotaurs, or Also Still Friday

Mar 10, 2017

Mazes! Minotaurs! Musicals! The unhinged, subterranean Moleman traps our small party of Illuminati coworkers with a dangerously imaginative game of his own design!

Mar 10, 2017

Mar 3, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 8: HR Giger's VHS Dungeon, or Also Friday

Mar 3, 2017

Down we go into HR Giger's dungeon to check out his expansive VHS collection for clues about the Lizard People. Perhaps our intrepid office workers will find the answers they seek in the home movies of HR's old unhinged friend - the Moleman!

Mar 3, 2017

Feb 24, 2017

Season 2 - Episode 7: Illuminati Courtroom, CVU (Corporate Victims Unit), or Friday

Feb 24, 2017

Deception! Impostors! Lizard People! Turns out the new interns were scouts sent up from the Lizards in the Inner Earth to infiltrate our beloved Illuminati! Let's take them to court! Everybody, into the conference room for a quick courtroom parody sesh...

Feb 24, 2017

Dec 9, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 6: A Very Doobie Episode, or Like Thursday, Man

Dec 9, 2016

Ruh-Roh! It's a midseason finale! Jaime Buffet & his buddy Roadie stumble upon a body, Chaad & Mikey aka the Bizness Boyz are back in action to solve the crime, and secrets are revealed about the mysterious new interns!

Dec 9, 2016

Dec 1, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 5: Synergy Reloaded, or Wednesday

Dec 1, 2016

Hank and Lloyd have a special treat for their new intern Guy Fieri! He's in for a cosmic whirlwind of flavor!

Dec 1, 2016

Nov 25, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 4: Incognito CEO, or Tuesday Night Primetime

Nov 25, 2016

Tonight on a very special Clerk & Dagger, Satan is in disguise and on the ground floor in the newest episode of the hit reality TV show Incognito CEO! Will the workers at the Illuminati figure out it's him? Will Satan learn a valuable lesson about life as a low-level employee? What cool gifts will Satan dish out at the end? Find out tonight on Incognito CEO!

Nov 25, 2016

Nov 18, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 3: Welcome to the Human Zoo, or Clawsday

Nov 18, 2016

It's Clawsday in the depths of the Inner Earth, so you know what that means! Let's all go to the Human Zoo! Yes, it's the perfect day for all the lizard boys and girls to listen in on the human specimens go about their business in their natural sitcom habitats. Be sure to pay a visit to one of the newest captives known as…Mystery Ken.

Nov 18, 2016

Nov 11, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 2: Interns, Interns, Interns (Interns), or Still Friday

Nov 11, 2016

Sam and Jimothy meet this mysterious new batch of interns and divvy them out to train under other coworkers. Keep an eye out on these fresh new faces!

Nov 11, 2016

Nov 4, 2016

Season 2 - Episode 1: Infamous Assassins Memorial Day Carnival and Picnic Jamboree, or Friday

Nov 4, 2016

No one escapes the office of the Illuminati! Clerk & Dagger returns to find Samantha Newberg settled into her well-earned role of "All-Star Intern" and overseeing a company carnival and picnic jamboree. Everything is going well until Hank & Lloyd invent new foodstuffs, four new interns mysteriously arrive, and Tammy's strange secret is revealed!

Nov 4, 2016

Nov 20, 2015

Episode 13: Casual Friday Forever, Pt. 2

Nov 20, 2015

In this second and final part of the season finale, Sam goes to the depths of bathrooms to find a mystical object long thought to be non-existent and quite possibly the only object that could stop Mystery Ken's evil plan -- The Rule Book!

Nov 20, 2015

Nov 11, 2015

Episode 12: Casual Friday Forever, Pt. 1

Nov 11, 2015

Sam awakens from the Dream Machine into a world of Casual Friday - a world of shorts, lime-a-ritas, and some jams! How is Sam going to get through the first part of this super-casual Clerk & Dagger Finale?

Nov 11, 2015

Nov 4, 2015

Episode 11: The Dream Machine

Nov 4, 2015

While locked and knocked out within the Dream Machine, Sam appears inside HR Giger's weird dream. She must find her way out with the help of Lil Dream Giger to investigate Mystery Ken's mysterious plan.

Nov 4, 2015

Oct 28, 2015

Episode 10: Fiddlesticks, or Thursday

Oct 28, 2015

Sam is distracted from her task of gathering signatures to follow a mysterious sound. What secrets will she uncover? What lives in the foul depths of the office park?

Oct 28, 2015

Oct 21, 2015

Episode 9: The Bizness Boyz Solve a Crime, or Wednesday Pt. 2

Oct 21, 2015

Chaad and Mikey take it over and go through the office to solve a mystery in their own kickass way! Y'all ready for this?!

Oct 21, 2015

Oct 14, 2015

Episode 8: Department of Breakrooms, or Wednesday Pt. 1

Oct 14, 2015

Gary quests for an outlet for the scavenger hunt to win Gail's affection, customer service gals Sallie Mae and Chevrolette hang out in the breakroom and take everybody down a peg, and Sam returns from the Cryptozoo!

Oct 14, 2015

Episode 7: New Employee Safety and Training Video, or Tuesday

Oct 14, 2015

After waking up from a long nap/sedation, Sam is placed in a room to watch an old copy of "New Employee Safety and Training" video.

Oct 14, 2015

Oct 6, 2015

Episode 6: Tammy's Monday, or Monday

Oct 6, 2015

Tammy's favorite day of the week has finally arrived: Monday! In order to keep the internet on, she must lead the weekly ritualistic bloodletting and lasagna potluck to appease the Wise One.

Oct 6, 2015

Episode 5: The Bathroom Priest, or Friday

Oct 6, 2015

Everybody's gotta go to the bathroom sometime during the workday! While you're in there, chat it up with everyone's favorite Bathroom Priest! You don't have much of a choice, he's always there for you! Samantha confesses her progress to the Bathroom Priest, and the mysterious evil mastermind truly behind the petition for Casual Friday emerges...

Oct 6, 2015

Episode 4: Gary's Call, or Thursday

Oct 6, 2015

Gary hasn't made a single phone call in customer service for years because of his D20-based contract. He's been on an incredible three-year luck streak! He spends most of his lonely days in his head as his heroic, high-fantasy self. However on this day of all days - Gambling Day - his luck is about to change!

Oct 6, 2015

Episode 3: The Department of Synergy, or Wednesday

Oct 6, 2015

After getting a secret mission from the Bathroom Priest, Sam's new job is to go around the office to get a mysterious petition signed. Her first stop: The Department of Synergy, which just barely contains the very energized, buzzword-inventing Hank and Lloyd!

Oct 6, 2015

Episode 2: Human Resources, or Tuesday Afternoon

Oct 6, 2015

Uh oh! Looks like Samantha's actions landed her into the biomechanical lair of Human Resources, which is managed by none other than HR Giger!

Oct 6, 2015

Sep 28, 2015

Episode 1: Sam's First Day, or Tuesday

Sep 28, 2015

Samantha Newberg starts a strange new job she found on Craigslist and meets her absurd coworkers.

Sep 28, 2015

- Extras -

- Cast & Credits-

Created by
Richard Kniazuk

Directed by
Kelly Opalko

Written by
Brandon Kirkman
Richard Kniazuk
Jesse Nicolaus
Kelly Opalko
Ashley Yates

Sound Design and Editing by
Luke Greskowiak

- Press -

- Episodes -

And we're back! It's the season finale, the top of the 6th inning, and the Lizard People are up 6-5. The world order is at stake! So we have one question for you: Are you ready for some soft...ball?

It's the first part of the season finale, so get your pennants and softball caps ready! It's the Lizard People vs. the Illuminati! Who will win control of the Illuminati Office and the Earth?

The Moleman's prophecies were true! Elder Lizard Prime and her loyal lounges of lizards are drawing up battle plans and ascending from the Inner Earth in their fleet of Magmabusses to conquer the Illuminati once and for all!

Ahoy! Mystery Ken and Trouble the Cat are marooned in a pipe sticking out of the vast underground ocean, until a mysterious day care boat arrives in their time of need. Will our two lost souls become guests aboard this eerie ship, or will they join the ranks of the captive orphans?

Mazes! Minotaurs! Musicals! The unhinged, subterranean Moleman traps our small party of Illuminati coworkers with a dangerously imaginative game of his own design!

Down we go into HR Giger's dungeon to check out his expansive VHS collection for clues about the Lizard People. Perhaps our intrepid office workers will find the answers they seek in the home movies of HR's old unhinged friend - the Moleman!

Deception! Impostors! Lizard People! Turns out the new interns were scouts sent up from the Lizards in the Inner Earth to infiltrate our beloved Illuminati! Let's take them to court! Everybody, into the conference room for a quick courtroom parody sesh...

Ruh-Roh! It's a midseason finale! Jaime Buffet & his buddy Roadie stumble upon a body, Chaad & Mikey aka the Bizness Boyz are back in action to solve the crime, and secrets are revealed about the mysterious new interns!

Hank and Lloyd have a special treat for their new intern Guy Fieri! He's in for a cosmic whirlwind of flavor!

Sam and Jimothy meet this mysterious new batch of interns and divvy them out to train under other coworkers. Keep an eye out on these fresh new faces!

In this second and final part of the season finale, Sam goes to the depths of bathrooms to find a mystical object long thought to be non-existent and quite possibly the only object that could stop Mystery Ken's evil plan -- The Rule Book!

Sam awakens from the Dream Machine into a world of Casual Friday - a world of shorts, lime-a-ritas, and some jams! How is Sam going to get through the first part of this super-casual Clerk & Dagger Finale?

While locked and knocked out within the Dream Machine, Sam appears inside HR Giger's weird dream. She must find her way out with the help of Lil Dream Giger to investigate Mystery Ken's mysterious plan.

Sam is distracted from her task of gathering signatures to follow a mysterious sound. What secrets will she uncover? What lives in the foul depths of the office park?

Chaad and Mikey take it over and go through the office to solve a mystery in their own kickass way! Y'all ready for this?!

Gary quests for an outlet for the scavenger hunt to win Gail's affection, customer service gals Sallie Mae and Chevrolette hang out in the breakroom and take everybody down a peg, and Sam returns from the Cryptozoo!

After waking up from a long nap/sedation, Sam is placed in a room to watch an old copy of "New Employee Safety and Training" video.

Tammy's favorite day of the week has finally arrived: Monday! In order to keep the internet on, she must lead the weekly ritualistic bloodletting and lasagna potluck to appease the Wise One.

After getting a secret mission from the Bathroom Priest, Sam's new job is to go around the office to get a mysterious petition signed. Her first stop: The Department of Synergy, which just barely contains the very energized, buzzword-inventing Hank and Lloyd!

Uh oh! Looks like Samantha's actions landed her into the biomechanical lair of Human Resources, which is managed by none other than HR Giger!

Samantha Newberg starts a strange new job she found on Craigslist and meets her absurd coworkers.

- Extras -

- Cast & Credits-

Created by Richard KniazukDirected by Kelly OpalkoWritten byBrandon KirkmanRichard KniazukJesse NicolausKelly OpalkoAshley YatesSound Design and Editing byLuke Greskowiak

Music byLuke GreskowiakRecorded at Big Dumb Sounds

Cover Art byBrandon Kirkman

Cast

Caitlin Checkeroski as Samantha Newberg

Richard Kniazuk as Tammy/Jubis

Rudy Schultz as Satan

Jake Dewar as H.R. Giger/Todd from Phoenix/Riley

Ashley Yates as Gary/Max Cott

Jesse Nicolaus as Gary's Inner Thoughts/Hank/Jim/Jimothy/Norm Alguy/Grundo

Tyler Babcock as Mystery Ken/Lloyd

Luke Greskowiak as Chaad

Brandon Kirkman as Mikey/Bathroom Priest

Noelle Hoffman as Chevrolette

Glen Kauffman as Tim/Jimothy/Nic Cage

Trevor Piecuch as Business Guy/Franklin

Mary Runkle as Ginger

Tony Melville as Jaime Buffet

Claire Reinhart as Elder Lizard Prime

Katilyn Grissom as Gaptooth Susie/Marsha

Toby McMullen as Extreme Sports Enthusiast

Hank Greene as Guy Fieri

Kelsey Rohrer as Lizzy Person

Mike Newquist as Depressed Trucker

Nathan Parker as Dockellis

Created by
Richard Kniazuk

Directed by
Kelly Opalko

Written by
Brandon Kirkman
Richard Kniazuk
Jesse Nicolaus
Kelly Opalko
Ashley Yates

Sound Design and Editing by
Luke Greskowiak

Music by
Luke Greskowiak

Recorded at Big Dumb Sounds

Cover Art by
Brandon Kirkman